The Battle for Custody
There are some battles in life that you must fight alone! Stop waiting for superman, grab your own cape and go. I recently went through an intense custody case and learned alot. luckily no one lost custody, we have a 50/50 legal agreement.
We Store Our Pain and Memories internally
I was listening to a song by savannah dexter called remember everything, and i started thinking about how much i relate to that song. Thats when somewhere in the middle of a billion memories i realized that pain and heart break never really change, and definately dont go away. To me, All of our pain gets stored on shelves, kinda like an internal library, with areas for experiences, knowledge, pain, love, and wishes.
The books on those shelves arent going to just vanish one day.... We are the only ones that can access those books, other than God. Sure, we can share a story anytime we'd like but.... the people we read the story to wont be able to see the detailed pictures that our mind printed on the inside of those books. The illistrations are what proves our stories are real, and anytime we read them to ourselves or others... that book comes right back to life on the inside... PTSD i guess you can say.
Though the thing i realized most while listening to that song was more about the insensity of our memories and pain, not their livelyness. With Time, comes age, and with age comes forgetfulness. Well let me break it down to you with another metaphor. This is the way i see it, but try to envision this as an animation.
Our mind is an internal library, with our brain as the source of all function and power, while our heart is the Full Legal owner and operator of this library. Ok...
Now inside this library theres a Librarian... He or She is a tiny fairy like version of yourself. That librarian knows where most things belong in the internal libtrary, and she/he is pretty good at sorting through messes. The Librarians main Job is to keep it quiet in their and make sure everything gets stored correctly in the right area and right spot on the shelves so they can be easily accessed when needed. As you continue living and filling this internal library you obviously age, and the librarian of your internal library does the same.
The more time passes the inside of your internal library collects dust like any other library does, and even cob webs in the more dark areas. Just as any human being does, Your librarian becomes slower and her vision weakens and her mobility and strength lessens over time. I personally dont believe that time heals, or that anything ever really gets erased. No, i dont beleive that at all.
I just think that The librarian of your internal library becomes older as you age yourself, and with that age comes other expected difficulties. As the Librarian becomes older it becomes harder to keep the Internal library maintained, the older areas become lined with dust. The librarian also has a more difficult time finding the correct books to pull cuz they arent seen as easily due to the collection of dust, and harder to reach. It also Very hard for the librarian to read the words written on the pages with weakened Vision. Plus, His/Her voice is no longer loud and fierce, it becomes distant and shaky..... Kinda hard for a story to really hit ya when its read like that.
So, in my opinion our pain doesnt fade, it only seems that way as we age due to our minds capsbility. When we age some of us develop conditions that cause memory loss and confusion... well, i think i actually just gave a wonderful explanation of how that kinda works..... see who needs a PHD... haha, thats only a joke. However, i do think i actually covered the topic super accurately